Jan 6th. May 25th. April 10th. April 28th. June 14th.. so many numbers. I still can’t believe it. Can you?
So many things happening around. Majority of my friends and college mates are getting married this year in 2008. Few already did in 2007. Did they too go through all I am facing now? Some say yes, its all natural and blah blah. But I guess it depends on how you approach the practical aspects apart from the dreamy world you live in. Some just close their dreams and move on with hard-hearted attitude. Some not-so-strong people like me, keep thinking why this is happening, why it didn’t happen that way etc, and keep brooding our minds with mixed thoughts.
Within these two months, there had been huge waves of hopes and dreams and uncertainty.The tide kept changing between high and low. Its almost like I am being dumb and deaf to the outside world and I am tending to withdraw within. As if people have moved on thinking my future is sealed. As if they need not help me anymore. As if they cannot be close to me anymore. There are so many to advise my future decisions, but none to pull me or with me to sail the boat in the turbulence. Some say R.K is there, why I am considering myself alone. Does that mean, married people never feel lonely? I had thought of inter-weaving the interactions with the two separate worlds and thereby forming a new Universal Union of which I can be part of the intersection. But as of now, all are dislike sets and member A is wandering here and there trying to find out its identity to where it belonged to. Career, Shifting location, new life, new friends, the responsibilities, the uncertainty and so on, on one side. The old friends, the inter-woven threads of memories, what about them? Do any of them still miss those sweet moments and chemistry we shared among us even now? So many has got scattered by the winds of time, and the thread seems swinging heavily.
When will the tide be calm?
PS: The PMT sucks!!! (the M stands for marital!!)