Welcoming 2017

Another day. Another year. Another retrospection? Not anymore.

I am done with looking back and setting goals. I do know that this maybe a temporary exhaustion, but I am more driven towards achieving little goals which are more practical.

Say, like being happy or enjoying “today” or a day without any guilt or worrying about future. Or saying yes to various things which I haven’t tried ever in the past just because of my inner beliefs, which acted as a burden on my conscience.


This year, the keyword or the tagline I am working on is “Be You”. That’s the mantra people pour out like a river, on every website or blog or counsellor you hit upon seeking for advise. I find it so hard to implement it when its actually simple.

The #LogKyaKahenge attitude is so ingrained in our lives, that though we want to escape from its clutches, and even if we do after few deep breaths, we could see it pouncing on us, whenever we look behind. I suppose the strength to face such invisible ghosts would come only by experience. Just like how as adults we shake away the fear of darkness. The knowledge that there is no actual “Ghost in the dark” or “Bhoots” coupled with the necessary tactics to drive away or face the real beasts boosts our morale to face these fears. Similarly, until I can wisely ignore all the taunts and the inner and outer voices, with the power of complete silence, I would still stumble. But that’s okay, No?Continue reading →

An evening walk.

After long period of dullness, I am roaming around the park in a failed attempt to revive myself. From the slumber of numbness. While waiting for my kid to complete her evening dance class.

I see different people of different ages on the way, while I attempt or rather force myself to a short walk.

Some aged men trying to walk the meagre distance, thereby squeezing the much needed exercise for their fragile bodies.

Old women huddled to each other, gossiping about their illnesses while some others with a smiling face are active in their evening walks.

Children running around are curiously looking at the tiniest leaf amidst the big grass lawn. The full-time maids in their broken English are handling the mischievous bigger kids, while slowly pushing the trolleys which has the cutest babies with wide eyes wondering at the marvellous images and colours of this beautiful earth.

The non stop chattering and usage of phone calls people do while taking a stroll forms the silent whispers of the environment. And the very few face to face talks of people actually interacting with each other provides the much needed liveliness to the same.

The faded shine of the flowers missing their best friend who feeds them whole day and the contrasting greens of the leaves comes across pleasing to the eye. The staff workers seems to be scrambling to finish off their work and return to their homes far away dreading the thoughts of traffic and impending work awaiting at home.

I finally stop my lazy stroll and find myself a place in the white bench made of wood rods. I wanted to pen this down as the thoughts has started overflowing. A stout lady with a dash of lipstick and dressed better than me, sits near me at the other end of the same bench, ignoring the other inviting three benches adjacent to mine. I stop scribbling in my phone halfheartedly, not to miss the thought flow streaming from my mind, and also wondering whether she would find me writing on the notes app installed by default on my phone.

In my older days, I would have given my best smile luring either her or myself to start a conversation. After all we are living in the same apartment complex. The modern form of neighbours which would have constituted a society or a small village on its own in a previous century. But today I was silent. Not even a fake smile wanted to adorn my gloomy face. The words were busy playing football with alphabets and words in my subconscious mind and the throat was dry. Hesitant to talk and feeling uncomfortable I still try to pretend writing as if I was replying to an urgent message. My hands were itching to complete the capturing process and my heart enjoying its stenographer job of its own boss.

Not able to follow my mind properly and write freely, I finally get up to find another secluded space for myself and start walking like many others. Following the crowd. Walking in their own world.

Half year updates 2016

Long time again.

Do you know how writer’s block happens to me, most of the time? It starts with my mood swings and end up having the negative thoughts about my thoughts and notes. We feel, whatever we wrote just now, need not be published, and is not worth it. Remember how in the movies, every writer, throws up paper after paper on the floor, filling the room with crumpled papers? Well, the only change these days is that it happens digital now. I did blog about this not too long back.

In between, I did try to launch a photo calendar in the beginning of last year, though the promotion post still lies somewhere in my drafts. Recently I also tried to upload some old music on soundcloud, since muziboo had been shut down. The Facebook mania has slowly worn out somehow, but the Instagram and Twitter addictions are still hanging around. I have even taken down the Facebook page for this blog, since there were so many likes which seemed like trolls and not real fans. What do you mean by fan after all. I am not a celebrity, and people who really want to read my thoughts can always log on to this website. The name is obviously too simple for it. I too had lot many subscriptions on Feedly and liked many pages on Facebook, but if I ever want to read the blogs, I just type or google the names, and instantly they show up.Continue reading →

New year 2016 – Project 365 completion and new goals

So 2015 is over and new year has arrived. This is the time people reflect on the past year and create new year resolutions. I too have been doing them for the last many years on this blog. But I rarely do try to do the postmortem of my previous wish list. What matters is the memory milestones, which I carry forward as appreciation and medals, to hang in my mental cupboard.

Last year 2015 I completed my first project 365 on photography. I did not cheat. I did take photo each day and posted on Instagram. This means I had to post pathetic photos on some days and that too the single photo I would have taken that day. When I started I did not have much hopes on me, and I had given the relaxed rules that if I ever I fail to take a photo, I could always post something from the past or leave it blank. But I did not had to. Is that what you call the conspiracy from the universe? It seemed that I had to do nothing much apart from not giving up each day. The rest was taken care of. Something or the other appeared before me, inviting me to click it to make it photo for the day. Taking photo was sometimes easy, as even an abstract image which people do not understand qualify as an image. Some people just call them more artistic than others though.

The tough times arrived in form of uploading to Instagram. I realised Internet was still not available as easily it should be, in many remote places. I can be actually grateful to the unfortunate timing of not being able to have many vacations this year, since if that had happened, I would not have had access to Internet many days and it would have stressed me more.

The second difficulty was Instagram itself. There were times when I couldn’t upload to Instagram from phone, but was able to do online. But there comes the big issue of uploading to Instagram through web. That was something of a tradeoff for DSLR pics, as they had to be scaled down for mobile/tablet uploads, and also transferred to the devices, rather than directly upload from laptop.

The third was the editing part. Seeing some of the images on Instagram and a many other social networks you wonder how they create such beautiful filters. Do they really pay for the innumerous filter apps out there? And does #iphoneography really does make a difference? As I saw more and more mobile photos, there were many times, like other noobs, to fall into the trap of upgrading the phone. I have still not found the answer of best mobile camera phone. Some say, its the mobile you have in your hand, and some say its iPhone.


Now that 2015 was over, I really wondered what could be my next year challenge. Though it was hard, the photo challenge did became a daily inspiration to me. There was something I could look forward to. It was similar to having a daily hobby class, though the class duration was very less.

In the last year, I came across several articles regarding gratitude, and how it transforms our life. Every year, the resolutions we keep are aimed at improving our life, and such articles scream again and again that yoga, meditation, practicing gratitude are the keys to happiness. Though I have not fully believed in these concepts, and how to incorporate these practices into my life, I thought why not start with something which I can correlate to.

Saying thank you is a practice we have been learning from childhood and I thought that would be much more easier than doing flexible physical exercises or being in silence. We just have to mould it into proper gratitude, or to be grateful for whatever we have every day and then slowly every moment, rather than saying thank you only when required. So this year’s word is going to be GRATITUDE.

Another target I have kept is to be healthy. This does not mean I want to lose weight or fat belly. I just want to be healthy. This can mean incorporating healthy eating habits or indulging in some form of exercise. Be it mere walking for half hour around my apartment or the terrace. Be it in being regular at night teeth brushing. Be it in having more salads and proteins. Cooking has not been my favourite department ever since I was born. But I need to realize its importance in our sustenance and health. It’s like a survival skill which needs to be taught in school, but unlike many other important survival skills, our education unfortunately doesn’t have that in our curriculum.

The last target is to read more books. In the last two years, without having any challenge, or any dedication towards reading books, I realized I read almost 10 books per year. So I am sure, that with proper attention, I could increase the number of the books and the quality of the books too.

What are your new year thoughts?